8 weeks down, 32 to go. :/

We had the first prenatal visit and ultrasound a few days ago, which has helped, in that I have gone two whole actual days without uncontrollably sobbing every 3 hours. It’s good to feel some agency or some control over my emotions for now, and to feel actually energetic enough to want to try to do something.

The first visit was reassuring, in that I liked this doctor better than my first, in that my partner was with me throughout it this time, in that the (*gulp* transvaginal alien probe) ultrasound showed enough detail that we could see little arms moving and wiggling happening in real time. During the first pregnancy, my son didn’t become a real little person to me until much later, when I could watch him bounce around with elbows and feet and knees poking out of my belly. Sometimes the thought of a little person down there is a comfort. Sometimes, though, it induces a little throb of claustrophobia, as if this body is too crowded and I can’t escape it. Some women love it, and more power to them, but it feels a bit like being a host in an Alien movie sometimes, like something might burst out. (P.s. body horror as a genre is not working for me right now.)

The physical changes and the discomforts are more immediately obvious to me than during my first pregnancy.  I’m already showing and uncomfortable in my clothes. My lower abdomen is more sensitive to pressure, so wearing pants low or unbuttoned isn’t going to work like it did till about month 6 of pregnancy number one. I have worn pajama pants to take my son to school *twice* now, which is unheard of for someone who uses clothing as a social armor to hide behind.

So my mission for Easter weekend is to make some pants. They have to come up over the bump in the front, and for comfort’s sake, I’ll be going with a back zipper closure on pretty much everything for the next year of my life. At this point, a basic full abdomen alteration will suffice, I think. Hot Patterns has the best tutorial I’ve seen so far on how to do this (here). An illustration of the flat pattern changes from their page:

fitting-full-abdomen-6

I have a pair of very large men’s dress pants that I bought from Goodwill that I might disassemble for fabric for this one, if my energy holds up. Updates to follow. 🙂

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Another day, another sewing fail.

When you wake up with the opening song from To Wong Foo in your head, you know a) you need more Patrick Swayze in your life and b) it may not be a good day, but it will be a *fabulous* one. Bring on the glitter eyeliner.

5SJJX5gAlas, my muslin / vomit green sage suiting version of the Hello, Sailor! pants are a bust due to my tree trunk of a waistline and the much dreaded camel toe that the tightness throughout my nether regions resulted in. Sigh. Light colored suiting seems especially prone to this.  Next try: going a size bigger and going with my usual natural tendency to do 3/8″ seams rather than forcing myself to do 5/8″ ones. Also, the characteristic bib type opening of the sailor pants as depicted in the pattern does have a certain kind of charm, but my buttonholes still aren’t quite ready to be up front and center in any garment. Saying screw it and doing grommet lace up closures on both sides with a button or two in the waistband on each side at the top. On another go around I want to try expanding on the idea of the bib-ish-thing of the original pattern and instead of having its weird long underwearesque fold down opening, make the whole front half + front waistband of the pants fold down in the same way with buttons along that side edge.

The way I learn is to expose myself to enough instances of the thing I’m trying to grasp that I gradually, subconsciously observe the patterns involved. My current Theory of the Pants Fly Feature is that it has to open up to the widest point of the hip but if it does that, it can open up and reattach almost anywhere along that waistline and fasten in almost any way as long as it’s sturdy. Experimentation to come.

(image borrowed from here: http://imgur.com/gallery/AqnB2)